Sabotage

I really was happy with the 0.8 lb weight loss - I mean, that's almost a pound. And after a few weeks of losing a lot, slowing down of the weight loss is bound to happen. And then the next day... I felt really bad about the weight loss. So I had popcorn (with butter) and pasta (with butter and cheese) - both foods are something I need to steer away from if I want to lose weight. Why is it that I need to feel validated by the number on the scale? I know I ate well the past week, but didn't exercise as much as I could have (due to work). I was following the program and I saw a loss, somehow - it just didn't seem like enough.

I have struggled with numbers on the scale for a long time. If I am trying to lose weight, but the scale doesn't reflect the amount of work I have been doing, it is VERY hard not to be discouraged. And being an emotional eater, once I get discouraged, I eat. And then after eating too much, I feel like a failure, give up all efforts of eating well and just pig out.

Perhaps the solution to this problem starts at the moment I feel discouraged - maybe I need to go for a walk or call and talk to a friend. I don't know. I also need to change my thinking about the scale. When you are dieting, it feels all consuming so I end up thinking about that number on the scale a lot throughout the day/week. I need to think about other things I did well.

But until I stop the binging, I'm going to forgive myself for messing up yesterday. Done. And then I'm going to focus on the next week. I'm going to eat well. I'm going to drink plenty of water. And I'm going to continue to be more active (did I tell you I'm taking the stairs now? 4 weeks ago I was getting off 1 flight below my apartment, now I'm up to 3 flights of stairs). Okay - now I'm working on a healthier me (and trying to wrap my brain around that concept)...